Over the past several years, the euphemism of “authenticity” came to an apex in public discourse, at least I think so. Some people, pundits, philosophers quite often examine whether items, phenomena, or individuals are authentic or not.  Supposedly it is a judgment call about what is definitively real and acceptable by experts and what isn’t.   If isn’t deemed authentic it is considered false.

Bear with me here: When I was working on my master’s degree in Music, I was doing some research and stumbled on an article in a Musicology related magazine.  Regarding Bach’s original music scores, the topic was about which school of thought was authentic and which wasn’t.  When playing from Bach’s original musical scores, should you play it exactly as written with the embellishments and written dynamics put there by the composer himself, and nothing else?  The second expression is by a keyboardist free to embellish at will, using variations in tempo and volume.  This Keyboardist sees Bach’s embellishments and other symbols of instructions as suggestions to build on embellishing with his personal style of expression, or how he hears it.  Whose expression is the most authentic and whose isn’t?  I guess it is what side of authenticity you are inside or out of.

There are two (or maybe more) schools of thought on that.  Where I stand with Bach straddles both sides of the fence.  If his exercises and inventions were designed to strengthen muscles and precision, I believe they should be expressed exactly as written.  It’s like the exercises you had to practice when you were learning the typewriter keyboard (how many of you remember typewriters?). I am a horrible typist and not so great a pianist either, (but I digress). When composing music, I can hear in my head how I want it and write the music score with those dynamics.  I think there is a place for both kinds of expressions and they are both authentic.  

I wrote some of the music for my Master’s Recital.  My score had tempo, dynamics, and other instructions/symbols written as I heard them in my head.  My pianist played the written score with his own expressions and I was so moved.  He took the music I wrote and brought it alive with all his expression of style. I felt so blessed that he was able to play the music better than I could have imagined.  He grasped what I wanted to exress with my music and yet interjected how his soul received it.  I was so humbled and honored.  He expressed it authentically, and even better as far as I was concerned. That, to me, is why composers compose. Every composer seeks to design a piece of music that will stand the test of time, no matter which school of thought you use. It’s pretty subtle and fluid.

As a 72 year old woman, I don’t have to choose between one school of thought or the other on anything. And I don’t have to choose anything and/or I can choose all of it. 

If someone appears to be inauthentic take a closer look.  Ask yourself if it really is about anything, or maybe they just make you uncomfortable. Unless they are an obvious con, who you see is who they are, uncomfortable quirks and all. They are as authentic as anyone else, or probably more so as they may be more self conscious (self aware) than most of us and have learned to own it.  

Just a little context here for the following:  When “chat” first became popular, in my case in the 1990s, I had an interesting time with it.  It taught me a new way of thinking, of learning who I am, and how to “listen” as well as contribute.

I was new to computers and wanted to explore things online and could quit typing at any time.  I had originally used a Tandy computer when I went back to school to get my post graduate teaching credential.  I used it as a word processor and it saved my life in my studies, as I am the world’s worst typist! My undergraduate work was a nightmare as I only had a manual typewriter and was constantly making mistakes, which made me anxious, and I made more mistakes from the anxiety.  Every 5 or less minutes I was screaming, “SHIT” and had to erase the mistake with an eraser and retype it again. When I graduated, I swore I wouldn’t do any further college work as it was too painful.

My neighbor sold computers he had assembled and sold them as a set.  As he was explaining things to me I got totally confused and had no idea what he was talking about. I didn’t understand the simplest things like, “what’s a cursor?” I told him I was totally intimidated by a “regular computer” so he suggested I get a “WebTV”.  Long story short, I bought one and found it manageable.

Before I met my husband, I was dating a guy who had a highschool aged daughter who spent the night at my house one night and she got right on the WebTV and started Chatting.  I was intrigued.  I watched her Chat for hours before we went to bed.  I didn’t even know that “Chat” existed before she showed me.  

The next morning I got up and turned on the WebTV, and after looking around the internet a bit and getting acquainted with my new toy, I found a website for Chat Rooms.  I chose one called “The Reflecting Pool”.  It was listed as a New Age Room where there was discussion about New Age Spiritual Ideas.  As I proceeded to read all the chat going on about it, I started contributing comments about a concept of Spirituality I had been mulling over in my mind but didn’t have any way to discuss it with anyone.  As time went by, I learned so much by just listening to others talk and responding as well.  I had people I could talk to.  

At first I was very private and didn’t give much information about myself. Later, as I saw people mimicking different personalities in jest, I also did the same.  I spent so much time laughing until I was crying, when the conversation was not serious, but I still did not let them know who I was.  Finally, I started being myself (of course personal info withheld) and found that when I was just being myself, I was authentic to them about my thoughts and feelings, and allowed my sense of humor to emerge. There are many things about us that are authentic but we are afraid to show others for fear of rejection. I discover that they really liked me!  They liked my concepts, ideas, and even my silly sense of humor.  In fact our best friends were made on Chat, and we made sure we all lived close to each other because of our emerging spiritual beliefs and like-mindedness.  

In case you were wondering, I also met my husband online.  He was also a little goofy when I spoke to him in the chat room, but when we spoke privately, I found him to be a seriously intelligent person revealing his authenticity.  I saw his goofiness was also an authentic part of him.  We eventually met in person and he seemed awkward to me, but then I seemed awkward to him, too.  I could have made our first encounter short and sweet because he was not the usual profile of the men I dated in the past (pretty inauthentic players) but I looked past his awkwardness this time and ended up with a pretty stellar guy.  This year is our 25th anniversary! Everyone who gets to know him totally LOVES him.  

I just have to tell them, in the words of Rosanne Conner: YOU DON’T THINK HE CAME THAT WAY, DO YA??!!   😂

I love the ways of Synchronicity. It is so very Authentic.